Last night at Prayer Meeting I was having a hard time getting started. I decided to do a little “house cleaning” using the Collect for Purity:

Almighty God, unto whom all hearts are open, all desires known, and from whom no secrets are hid, cleanse the thoughts of my heart by the inspiration of Thy Holy Spirit…

In the recent “thoughts of my heart” I found some pretty strong irritations, judgments, envies, angers, and couple of borderline resentments. I began to pray my usual, “Lord, help me to love so and so, etc.”

Response: “Not even I can help your selfish self to love anybody. He can’t be helped, strengthened or cured; only crucified. What say we put him out of his misery?”

I knew it was true. I know that guy too well. He’s hopeless. He has to go.

Upon further reflection, I realized that most things that grind the gears of my selfish self hardly bother Jesus at all. When I feel irritation rising, I’m learning to ask, “How much does this bother Jesus?”

I can hardly imagine Jesus being bothered about anything. Heart-broken? Yes. Bothered?

Galatians 2:20 I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me. 

Romans 6:6 We know that our old self was crucified with him …